Ignore the wild claims for seaweed wraps and spin classes. Real wellbeing is about fun, fairness and relationships

I did not intend to have a spa experience. The plan was to go for afternoon tea, but the spa next door was included in the price. And so arrived a “wellbeing” menu, where one could choose between seaweed wraps to purify and a meditative steam room with energising lights to destress. I thought massage was the least worst option, but after it was explained to me how it would detoxify and re-energise me, I felt a potent mixture of despair and rage.

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